From under the moving boxes...

Just a quick note to say I am moving tomorrow, hence the silence from my little corner.

Thank you for all your comments in the last couple of posts... I am just too swamped with packing and all to get back to you! I really miss blogging and visiting you, dear friends, and will be back as soon as possible.

I am excited to be moving and will (hopefully) let you know the long story of how this all came about when I resurface. *smile*

Wonder-FULL

I absolutely adore this picture of my middle child Marcus that I took in January of 2005 when he was just 11 months old. I try to tell the boys that Marcus is "talking" to that baby in the hole in the floor but I can't seem to fool them...seems pretty believable to me. What do you think? ; )


For more faces of wonder click on the button below.

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Re posted from the archives.

those moments in time

I look for him... and find him... in his crib,
yes, still in his crib of babyhood days, those days that are so fleeting.
I tip toe into room to ask what's wrong, and he raises his head, thumb still in mouth,
to say that nobody wanted to play with him.

I am surprised that he would feel a deep enough hurt
to want to go lay in his bed with the sheets and blankets of familiarity around him.
I gather him close and lift him out.
Here is my chance, for some time alone with this little one of my heart
while the others are off playing by themselves.

I lay down with him in toddler bed of older brother...pull covers up close.
We lay there facing each other and I gaze into his face of soft smooth skin,
searching within those deep blue eyes ringed in long lashes,
He looks deep into mine and rests his hand on my cheek... I wonder what he's thinking.
I watch the place under his chin that moves up and down while he sucks his thumb,
listening to the quiet sounds of him breathing.

Pressing my face into the warm curve of his neck, I breath deep.
The baby smell is gone from him... that sweet scent of soap and newborn...
it's hard to describe but what I have now is... little boy.


Growing up so fast each and everyday.
If only I could slow the time, if only I could go back to when he was new and cherish the moments again. But I know it's not possible, just wishful thinking and really
what I need is to live in the moment... to not look back or forward but to live right now.

We lay there like this for mere minutes in time and then he's ready to go again,
off to run and jump and play and to probably scream and fight and cry
but that's okay, it's all part of having these wonder- full boys who are so consumed with life.

I am just so glad I took the time to stop and to savor a precious moment in this beauty- full journey of motherhood.

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Related: Holy Experience ~ The only way to slow time down.

Love Amazing

Once upon a time she dreamed...
of babies and blankets, of home and happiness,
playing for hours in attic room were vaulted ceiling hugged in close,
and rows of shoe boxes along the wall held baby dolls
tucked tight for naps.

Then she grew, put dolls away
for bigger and better...her prince had come.
Four years later, happiness...finally... a precious tiny baby.
And as years went by, another and another...
and then, lo and behold... another!

But something happened, then,
to shatter hopes and scatter dreams.
That little treasure tucked within...
passed away... and life would never be the same.

Through darkness of sorrow, though, and wounded soul,
she felt comfort and love like never before.
That love, of her Heavenly Father,
so strong and pure, so true and gentle.

And she knows he will never leave her, so she lives again,
gathering pieces, thanking him for her earthly prince
and their heritage of three,
resting in her Father's arms, looking to the day...

That day when she will see her child
for the first time
in that beautiful place
of happily ever after.

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On July 15 of 2007 I miscarried at 10 weeks gestation. I have wanted to write my feelings about this ever since, in a way that would show just how much I felt the powerful presence of God and his amazing love during this heartache in my life... and so this is it. I am thankful to finally have it written out... my heart thoughts put into words... so that I will never forget how deep is the Father's love for me.

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Related post by L.L. Barkat at Seedlings in Stone.
Photo: I'm on my way to the ball... June 2008

On Being Silly.

It's tough to get a good picture of my boys when they are in a mood like this...

"The greatest thing a human being ever does in this world is to see something...

To see clearly is poetry, prophesy and religion, all in one."

~John Ruskin

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I have been busy going through my photo archives, touching up and sorting...

...thinking about detail and focus, color and expression.

Seeing... delighting...

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Photo: a Columbine in my garden last summer.

Seeking...

Writing out the Word on index cards to be taken with me throughout the day...

...pulled out of envelope to be studied during times of waiting... or on evening walks...

to be glanced at and then repeated in quiet thoughts while stitching up quilt by hand,

or to be propped on window sill to be read while preparing food for empty stomachs...

I fill my heart, hiding His Word deep down, food for my soul when I need it most...

which is so often, each and every day.

One of my favorite passages about memorizing in the Bible is this:

How can a young man keep his way pure?
By living according to your word.
I seek you with all my heart;
do not let me stray from your commands.
I have hidden your word in my heart
that I might not sin against you.
[...]
I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways.
I delight in your decrees;
I will not neglect your word.

Psalm 119: 9-11 & 15-16.

Isn't this what it's all about anyway...

...that we might not sin against Him?

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And then I made these...

Tiny envelopes made to tuck a single tea bag within...
... and possibly a scripture verse to encourage the recipient?

A great way to use up little scraps of fancy paper,
don't you think?

I'm Seeing... Noticing...

The sun shone brightly that whole Sunday afternoon, so

bundled up against cold wind, camera in hand, I headed out unto the prairie to see what I could see...


...to find beauty in nature and to praise God in the beauty.

As I walked... and looked... and listened, I kept sensing His Word from within,

"The heavens declare the glory of God, the skies proclaim the work of his hands" Ps. 19:1

From the icy patches of frozen crystals hovering upon golden strands...

...to the skies of blue where the winds stretch clouds across the expanse like lengths of white cotton candy.

I see.

When I close my eyes and face the wind,
ice cold against rosy cheeks,
and I lift my head to catch rays of light...

I feel...

He is here... the whole earth is filled with his glory.

Wandering over drifts of snow, hardened into icy mounds six ... even 8 feet, at times... above the ground, I am amazed and in awe of the way the wind has sculpted these flakes into different waves of beauty white.

I stop often and gaze far out into the open...

across the fields to the horizon, marveling

at the freedom these wide spaces allow me to feel...


... then down at my feet where goose down feather is captured amongst the tangle of matted grass.

I peer close, upon my knees, to see in detail the soft white... the movement

as it struggles to escape.


I freeze the moment within my lens, then pick it up and let it fly on wings of wind

for seconds in time before it drifts again to ground below.

That little burst of flight causes my breath to catch...

so much like I feel right now.

Outside, alone...

in the silence, wind and sunlight.

I love this...

...this seeing which adds so much depth to my days.

I'm seeing things along this walk that I have passed many times...

but for the first time I am noticing.

Two perfect rows of trees.

The round of barbed wire, forgotten under grasses grown tall.

A weathered barn, framed by branches stark against the winter sky.

The rusted red chipped paint of bygone days.

And I thank my God for this opportunity to open my eyes and take in the wonder that surrounds in simple every day things.

I need not go far... to places unknown, for he has provided in every place, in every adult and child, in every sense...

beauty.

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Related posts:

Laure's "The 9 o'clock evening hour"
L.L. Barkat "writer must see"