Saturday, February 27, 2010

On Decorating for Spring...

Thinking about my living room, loving it, cleaning it, letting the sun shine through it and dreaming about decorating for Spring/Summer. Here are a few pictures that I found through google images that I am drawing my inspiration from. I love the red, yellow, green and turquoise colors in the rooms below.

We hope to get a new couch and love seat set in the near future and I think these colors of pillows would look great on a chocolate brown set. (maybe not the orange and yellow... still thinking on those...) I love my wall color so I won't change that, I would just love to brighten up the room with some cheery accents.

Images found here, here and here

Anyway, below is a shot of the amazing bookcase/fireplace/entertainment center that my wonderful carpenter husband built for our living room this past winter. I am so, so pleased with it. When the books are taken out, the shelves and wood behind are white to go with the center panel. It looks really great. I enjoy having my books out in the open (they were all put away in a cupboard before) and I like this warm look for fall and winter but for spring and summer, I would like to lighten it up by taking out a bunch of the book so that some of the white from behind can show through, and adding some simple vases or bowls in the accent colors I love... kinda like in the pictures above. Oh! and another great feature that I love is that the bookcases are both lit with little puck lights which shine down behind all my books. It looks so great, especially at night!

And here are some more shots of my home (including a different angle of my living room which shows the couch and chair)... if you're interested. I would love to brighten up my kitchen as well but don't like a cluttered look so I will continue to think on that a bit more... any suggestions?

Friday, February 26, 2010

Drip, drip, dripping

Old Autumn drop your leaves, for new green is soon to appear in their place.
Old seeds, still clinging, we've no more need, for ones dropped in months past are soon to burst
forth with fresh beauty and splendor.
Old Winter, be gone, make way for Spring. Snow melt, ice break, for you can't hang on forever.
There is a time for every season and soon your time will pass.

Yes, Spring is not for at least another 3 weeks yet. But the weather here has been amazing the last few days and I am smiling.
Out here on the prairies we take any hope of Spring we can get!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

"Ah! There's nothing like staying home for real comfort. "
~ Jane Austen


I've now knit 5 hats so far and have another one on the needles... a variegated blue one this time for another one of my boys. Thanks to a dear friend of mine who gave me a bunch of her small balls of yarn to experiment with and who taught me to knit in the first place!

Saturday, February 20, 2010

A new hobby.

I curl up on couch, throw the blanket over my legs, stretch my toes toward warmth of glowing fire, and I knit.

This has provided so many relaxing moments for me this week and I hope for many more as I experiment with this new hobby of mine.

It took me just 2 days to finish this little hat that I made for my 4 year old Allan. I love it on him.

How do I manage to find the time? I knit mostly when the boys are doing their book work during their homeschooling in the mornings. They need someone to sit with them to keep them from losing focus and fooling around too much but they don't necessarily need me to watch them constantly so, as I'm giving out spelling words to Jayden, or listening to either of them read aloud, I knit. And I knit in the evening after the boys are in bed and it's just Husband and I in the quiet. Him usually reading or us just talking. I just love the calm, home feelings it gives.

I am so excited to make more. Next on the list is a hat for a dear friend of mine who, when she saw this one, asked for one too.


Oh! And I just wanted to mention what I found on the 'net the other day as I was perusing photography blogs. Check this out... I absolutely adore this sweet cream colored newborn hat with the flowers! (just scroll down a bit on her blog and you'll see it.) So precious!!! I wonder. Is it crocheted or knitted? I think it must be crocheted. Which is fine... I really wanna make this so I'll learn that next.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Soccer in the snow.

The boys were able to finally play outside for hours yesterday. The weather was beautiful. Snow in the morning with clear, sunny skies in the afternoon.
They made snow castles with an old bucket and blew bubbles through an old pipe in the big mud puddle which they called their pond, they threw snow balls and made forts, they pulled each other on their sled and made wonderful wandering tracks and trails all about the yard.
I finally ventured out in mid afternoon to capture some pictures and was amazed at the warmth. I love this... gives me hope for spring, it does.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Thoughts at 10 weeks

It's one a.m. and I awake. Don't know what wakes me but mind begins and sleep evades for an hour or more. This is how it's been this week, my 10th week of pregnancy. Tonight it's the same and rather than fight, I get up and softly making my way from the bedroom, I grab pen and paper from the desk and, curled up in woolen blanket, under soft light of single lamp and fireplace glow, I write. I need to get my thoughts out and down into words I can read.

I was 10 weeks along when the agonizing experience of loss ripped through body and soul with my first miscarriage, over 2 1/2 years ago. I thought that I would be fine coming into my 10th week with this pregnancy but the truth is striking, unexpected, real.

I am unsure, unsettled, every twinge, sensation within, is noted. Questions of whether I still feel pregnant or not tumble back and forth through my mind. I feel so well, physically, and maybe the lack of nausea means that something's not right?

And not a day this week has gone by that I haven't thought about the baby I lost.

I haven't spoken of the inner turmoil but I sense that Husband feels it too and that we will both breathe a sigh of relief to see this week pass behind us. I know these thoughts are not realistic or logical but who thinks of that in matters of the heart.

Yet, I am still surprised at my thoughts. I had felt so confident that the Lord was protecting me from fear. And He has and is. It's not so much fear that I feel as just unsettling thoughts about the awfulness of my first miscarriage playing through my mind. And just an eagerness to get to 13 weeks when I will be able to hear the steady and sure rhythm of baby's heartbeat.

On Friday evening, we went out, him and I, just the two of us, for a little shopping. Unplanned and unexpected we found ourselves in the maternity store of the mall. Then to the back, belly pillow in place, with bated breath I tried on an outfit.

I stood there, alone, behind the curtain, gazing at the transformation of my shape. The beauty of a woman with child makes my heart ache. Yes, the "belly" was not real but I knew that beneath, tucked away within my womb was a baby, with fingers and toes already developed, with tiny features beginning to show, a precious body being formed in the image of God and my heart swelled with the wonder of it.

I am anticipating with such excitement the changing of my body as the baby grows. And, yes, with his urging me to do so, we bought some items, though I am hardly showing and won't wear them for a few weeks yet, and then headed out for dessert.

And as we sat, facing each other, he reached across the table for my hand and gently asked, "Have you thought about any names yet?"

I lowered my eyes and shook my head, "I haven't really dared to go there."

He understands.

But the next day I am feeling the need to combat the unsettling thoughts in my head and so we talk, mention different names, ones we've always liked but haven't had the chance to use yet, we look up the meanings and discuss some more. We talk about my thoughts on setting up the baby room, especially the cradle that he built which has rocked all three of our boys. How I long to take it out of storage, clean it, make new bedding for it and just let my hand caress along its rails... and dream.

This is new for us, we are tentative. We haven't hardly talked about the baby together at all yet during these first 10 weeks. Does that seem terrible? Maybe. But, though I have my inner hopes and quiet dreams, I just can't seem to voice them. Voicing them just makes it seem that I am taking it for granted that we can keep this baby. Is my trust in the Lord a little shaky? No. I know that the Lord is sovereign that He knows all things, that He loves me and knows me and I can fully and utterly put my life and that of my baby in His hands.

And so the outward calm portrayed throughout the days this week have in some way managed to mask the inner tumultuous thoughts but as I sit here in the quiet of the night, I know I must continue to pray and search my heart for words of scripture. Never stop. His tender promises soothe my soul.

" For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2Tim. 1:7
"Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord." Psalm 31:24
"And the peace of God which passes all understanding will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:7

And so I rest in the Lord and the hope and peace He provides. He is my strength and my song.

Friday, February 12, 2010

And I am in Love.

My heart is full, overflowing,
basking in moments,
tender pockets of time,
strung together throughout
the quiet, simple days of my life.

When three small boys
snuggle in close
cheeks resting on shoulders
of one next to them.
Anticipating, imagination kindled with
words I read
from classic books.
Entreating voices,
"Just one more chapter!"

When I snuggle in close
and my cheek rests
on muscled shoulder
after long day apart
And when his fingers
gentle, but strong,
travel up and down my back
during slow hug hello

I close my eyes, smile,
breath deep heart swells
And I am in love
with this life, these children,
this husband, His Grace

Just thinking about Valentine's Day and all the thoughts of love it brings with it and how I am so blessed to be able to celebrate life and love with those special lives in my home. Those ones I hold close to me each day of the year. May I never forget or take for granted the beauty and treasure of what I have.
May your February 14th be filled to overflowing with love that continues all year. Enjoy your Valentines!
Instructions for the Valentine Heart Garland

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Grateful beyond words.

Did you read Ann today?


I had to gulp back sobs as I read...

I can relate to what she wrote in so many ways and to think that I have been so blessed as to, soon... yet again, get to experience the wonder of swelling womb and newborn softness.

Is there anything more humbling than this?

That my Lord would choose me to nurture, within my body, another human being, another eternal soul.

I am grateful beyond words...

Almost 10 weeks pregnant.
Photo: tree in Spring 2009 bursting with new life.